I was really hopeful for a bit, thinking there was a 90% chance she'd get approved, even if she had Fair credit. It would just give me the loan at Prime Rate + 1.5% at the most.
So this confirms it for sure now. I really am screwed.
I've done a lot of thinking of the best and worst Scenarios from here.
Worst - I have to leave here before the semester is finished and go straight to work... If i can't get some kind of forbearance on my Current student loans. My UM account goes to UM collections (again) and i'll have to bleed money from whatever paycheck i can find. I won't be able to get back into the college game for a long long time.
Best - I can finish the semester if i get a forbearance or deferment, I Work on campus... When it's over, I go straight to work and start earning some money regularly. I have to shape up and do commissions for money... however possible. eBay stuff... 5$ emergency commissions. I still won't be able to get back into the college game for a long time... BUT, if i'm working and making money... i MAY actually be able to make it to Anthrocon next year if things aren't so tight. --> From here on..... either way... I simply can NOT continue going to UM. This is most certainly, my LAST semester here. As much as i LOVE this place, the faculty, and everything(though i wish it was reciprocated a little more...) It's just not feasible. It won't happen.
I am exploring options at FIU the state college, and i'll have to transfer and finish all my degrees there. I've bled enough money. I must live within my means. It's all i can do.
you can't get Blood from Stone!
I have to put all of my ambitions on hold for a long LONG time, again.
I drew this pic last night... because it's a little hard for me to be brave right now.
But I'm a fighter.
I was having these miniature panic attacks last night... this sick cold feeling in my gut. Not good. I'm better now that i made a few decisions about the future though.